Can Four Steps Turn a Mistake Into Momentum?
So There I Was…
Sitting in a team meeting a couple of years ago. We were discussing whether to use a significant amount of money in our budget for a new project. A new team member, who held a position of authority, was really pushing the idea. From the group’s point of view, this person didn’t have all the necessary information and also seemed to resent being told no.
As a Guardian, I can slip into a negative tendency of interrogating people when I think they are incompetent. This person was a strong Pioneer who had always gotten their way through being a force of nature. As they kept pushing for this high-risk project, I saw a thousand unanswered questions. Without thinking, I started firing questions in rapid succession, not to seek clarity but to prove myself right and them wrong.
Thankfully, before things got too heated, I caught myself. I shut down my line of questioning, but I knew I had just displayed a negative tendency that lowered my influence with the group. That moment became a perfect candidate for the CORE Process.
Sidebar: Guardian vs Pioneer Tendencies
Guardians are careful, thorough and detail-oriented. They value proven methods, stability and protecting resources. In stress, they can become overly critical or interrogating.
Pioneers are bold, strategic and vision-driven. They value big-picture opportunities and decisive action. In stress, they can become forceful, dismissive of caution or resistant to being told no.
When these two voices clash, the Guardian can see the Pioneer as reckless and the Pioneer can see the Guardian as obstructive. Without self-awareness, both can dig in and damage trust.
The Challenge
The real problem wasn’t the budget discussion. It was my inability to manage my own tendencies in the moment. I had shifted from seeking understanding to trying to win an argument. My focus had moved away from the team’s best interest and toward proving my point.
The truth is, when leaders let their negative tendencies drive their actions, it erodes trust. Even if you have valid concerns, the way you deliver them can undermine your credibility. Without a way to process these moments and plan a better response, the pattern will repeat itself.
The Tool: The CORE Process
The CORE Process is a simple but powerful decision-making framework that helps you marry self-awareness to action. It works by identifying a learning opportunity and then moving through four steps:
Call It – Identify the cold, hard facts of the situation
Own It – Acknowledge your role and responsibility even if others contributed
Respond – Create a plan to address the issue or apply your new insight
Execute – Put the plan into action with a deadline and accountability
The first two steps, Call It and Own It, focus on knowing yourself. The last two steps, Respond and Execute, are about leading yourself. This process keeps you from staying stuck in regret or frustration and pushes you toward concrete, healthy action.
Why This Matters Now
Leaders are constantly navigating moments where emotions and tendencies can take over. Without awareness, those moments can damage relationships and credibility. The CORE Process gives you a structured way to slow down, learn from what happened and intentionally choose a better path next time.
The Result
Here’s how I used the CORE Process after that meeting:
Call It – I had let my negative Guardian tendency take over and interrogated a team member in a way that shut down healthy dialogue.
Own It – I had shifted my focus from understanding the proposal to proving myself right. This was not about the project anymore, it was about me.
Respond – I decided to reach out to the team member to acknowledge my part in the tension and to ask for a follow-up conversation where we could exchange ideas without defensiveness.
Execute – I scheduled that conversation within the week and asked a trusted colleague to hold me accountable for how I approached it.
By addressing my behavior quickly and constructively, I repaired the working relationship and learned to pause before letting my tendencies take over.
Take Action
Think of a recent moment where you wish you had handled yourself differently. Put it through the CORE Process. Be honest about your part and make sure your Execute step includes both a deadline and accountability
Do you want to strengthen your ability to navigate high-stakes conversations and keep your influence intact? Let’s talk about how the CORE Process can help you and your team lead with clarity and confidence.
Closing the Loop
That meeting could have ended with lasting tension and damaged trust. Instead, the CORE Process gave me a way to own my behavior, repair the relationship and improve my leadership in similar situations going forward. That is the power of knowing yourself and then leading yourself.
Lead Hard!
