Are You Getting Your Signals Crossed?
Welcome to another Toolkit Tuesday! Every week, our goal is to give you a practical leadership tool to put in your toolkit.
The Challenge
So there I was… doing what I love: celebrating wins with my team. I believe in encouragement. I believe in energy. And I believe in calling out what’s going right.
But then one day, a Sailor came to me with a serious concern—looking for care and a little clarity. Instead of leaning in and listening, I launched into collaborating for possible solutions. I thought I was helping.
Instead, they walked away feeling unheard.
It was a leadership miss. And I’ve seen the same dynamic play out inside dozens of businesses.
Leaders with great intentions… sending the wrong signal… and wondering why they’re not getting the response they expected.
The Tool: The Communication Code
The Communication Code gives you a common language to communicate clearly and avoid missed signals. There are five types of communication—each with a different purpose:
Celebrate – Call out what’s going right.
Care – Offer support, empathy, or understanding.
Clarify – Define roles, expectations, or processes.
Collaborate – Solve problems and work through decisions together.
Critique – Provide feedback to improve performance.
Each one is helpful when used intentionally. But when you send one and your team is expecting a different one? You get frustration, not connection.
Why This Matters Now
Communication breakdowns don’t always show up as drama or tension. They can show up as Confusion. Or mistrust. Or avoidance. Or underperformance.
That’s what happens when your team walks away thinking, “They didn’t hear me… and they definitely don’t get me.”
If you’re not getting the feedback, buy-in, or energy you expect from your team, it might not be a people problem—it might be a communication code problem.
The Result
When you learn to use the right code at the right time, communication becomes frictionless.
Your team feels heard.
Expectations are clear.
Feedback is received.
Culture improves.
And instead of getting crossed wires, you create clarity, trust, and ownership—one conversation at a time.
Take Action
Here’s how to take action to grow your leadership this week:
Ask your team this simple question: “When you come to me, which of these five do you usually want: Celebrate, Care, Clarify, Collaborate, or Critique?” (You might be surprised by their answers.)
Book a free strategy session. Want to build a communication culture that cuts through confusion and builds trust? We’ll help you apply this tool to your real-world team dynamics.
Closing the Loop
That Sailor didn’t need a pep talk—they needed clarity and care. I missed it then. But I’ve gotten better at listening because I now know the codes—and it’s transformed my leadership.
Lead hard.
